WARNING DON'T READ IT ALL!!!
Greetings mortals! I have arrived.
Now BOW!!! or just sit on your desk and do "weird-ed out" facial expressions as you pointlessly try to imagine the powerful sound of my voice. Of course this is just a futile attempt, and you will for ever wander aimlessly through the narrow results of google+.
Now, since I feel responsible for making you use your imagination for longer than 34 seconds, I will alleviate your curious mind of such tediousness. HOW? you ask. Well Imagine if you will; The sound that a mighty brown bear makes when he is pooping... yep...
SO! we got that out of the way, and from now on you can rest your brain as you no longer have to try and imagine the sound of my voice but rather, you get to enjoy my poor grammar and wonder WHY DID I READ THIS SH*T!!!!. oh yeah its a introduction post.

Well Woke up today with a mouth full of human ashes. “This shit again” I thought when i realized what it was. No time to really shower so I just coughed some of the ashes on my hands and gave myself a good rubdown, having seen certain small animals do it the same way only with sand or gravel. So far as I know, that’s what happened to Kratos.
I always write topics for forums the same way, wearing nothing but some headphones and listening to music that bolsters my nerve for the start of conversations. I think of it as a kind of Flight of the Valkyries scene from Apocalypse Now, only it's a sea of web surfers running in terror before me at the sound of whatever I have blasting out. Only real difference is that I always have to remind myself that nobody else can hear what's coming out of my headphones, but only after replying to someone out of the crowd and yelling "DO YOU HAVE NO FEAR,CHILD? I AM A HELICOPTER, GODDAMMIT!"